Friday, December 12, 2008

Designing Women...

... is on at 4AM MST on TV Land.

You wanna know how I know? 'Cause I can't sleep.

Really. I cannot sleep.

My body has grown too accustomed to Triazolam. To be honest, it's tough not to feel bitter and angry, here at 4AM MST, unable to sleep.

I wouldn't be in this predicament if the LDS Church treated gays humanely. It was my following the counsels of the LDS Church that I started taking Triazolam--for three [insert favorite swear word in adjective form here] years... not healthy.

I'm tired. I'm grumpy. To be honest, I sort of feel like throwing a rock through a window of the LDS Church office building (which is but a hop, skip, and a jump from where I live). I know this is just because I'm tired and grumpy right now, and I would never throw... okay, so I've been known to throw rocks through windows--but not on purpose!

Many moons ago, I was outside playing, and I saw a sparrow perched on the roof of my house. I thought to myself, "I am going to throw a rock and hit that sparrow."

Yeah, yeah, I know: DON'T DO IT, YOU FOOL!!!

I mean, best case scenario in my mind: I kill a bird... which I wouldn't eat or use in any sort of "your death was not in vain" sort of way. I would have been so cool.

Anyway, fool that I was, I threw the rock. It was headed straight for the bird... right towards it, I promise... then it started to curve... it was a fantastic curve--which curve lead straight to the middle of the side-door window of my parents' minivan.

Long story short: it took a while for my parents to find me.

Mad About You comes on after Designing Women. When I was maybe 12, 13 years-old, I watched an episode of Mad About You. In this episode, the principle male character, Paul, was having his fertility tested... I was utterly confused. I had absolutely no idea how a guy could ejaculate outside of heterosexual, penis-in-vagina copulation.

Seriously, I had no clue.

This is my memory of Mad About You.

Anyway, I'm going to try once again to fall asleep... wish me luck (but not too loudly) !


  1. [whispered] good luck. Just turn on BYU TV. You'll be asleep in no time.

    Sorry, couldn't resist.

  2. Just turn on BYU TV. You'll be asleep in no time.


    sorry... I mean lqtm(*).

    (*) laughing quietly to myself

  3. oh hell don't get me started on BYU-TV. I told my last bishop I was having testimony issues and that's what he told me to do. Watch BYU-TV.

    *rolls eyes*

    Hope you get some sleep

  4. Hey there.

    Try reading. I find that helps. Reading my NIV version of the Bible fatigues me enough, not because the NIV is boring of course, but because the printing is so small it requires extra effort to make out the words, lol. Why is it that the pages in the Bible are so thin and the writing so small? Oi. LOL. OH and don't forget to respond to my e mail! :)

    Keep posting your blogs. I enjoy reading them. That's why I bookmarked your page. :)