Monday, December 15, 2008

S'mores & Aardvarks

S'mores and aardvarks... two things that wouldn't ordinarily go together--I'm picturing an aardvark eeating [sic] s'mores, not someone eating both an aardvark and s'mores at the same time [sick].

Truth be told, I don't think aardvarks would like s'mores. Well, maybe Arthur and his family. But they're mutants.


I think that describes me, yes?

You know what I realized: it's been ages since I've had a scab or a blister. You know what that means? My life is too cushy. I need to go and scrape my knee.

I miss living on a crop farm. I miss it oh-so-very much. Whenever I was sad, frustrated, annoyed, confused, or even just really happy, I would go out to the fields, sit on a wheel line, and meditate.

In fact, I wish I were there right now. In my insomnia, I would be out there, sitting on a wheel line, looking up at the sky, watching the stars, and just absorbing the dark silence. I haven't sat and watched stars in a very, very long time. I miss it.

You know, some people say that looking at the stars makes them feel insignificant. Me, I feel quite the opposite. Well, maybe not in a 'significance' sort of way. I mean, I wish I were really making a difference somehow, but I'm probably not.

But I do feel unique -- and in that uniqueness, special.

I like that I'm not exactly like anyone else. I like that I can be somewhat unpredictable. I like that I am eccentric. I like that I'm eclectic. I would like it if I'm 'ec' anything else.

I like me.

Awww... tender moment... uh... with myself... ~ahem~

On that note: I want to learn Flamenco.


  1. I especially love your first paragraph. I had to stop reading for a second to finish laughing so I could continue =)

  2. I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets me.

    =), indeed

  3. You don't have to live on a crop farm to get away from people and look up at the stars.

  4. It would make it much easier, though. That's one thing I miss from living in a small town... seeing the stars...

  5. Hey Andrew.

    Whenever I type your name, I cannot help but feel like a part of me is a little crazy because we share the same first name. LOL! It's hilarious. It's great, it's awesome. :)

    Anyhow...have you thought of taking a chair and sitting outside at night when you can't sleep? Reading helps. Also, focusing your mind on a mantra...the stars, the ocean, a green field...even on an image of Christ...I think may help you.

    I sent you a VERY long response to your last e mail by the way. You asked questions that, when I am asked, I tend to provide a lot of detail. So I apologize for the length. Hopefully you'll be able to respond to it all lol.

    Oh and about am I. :) I love all sorts of music. When it comes to rap and country though, I tend to be a bit picky. Rap I specifically tend to a couple of Coolio's songs and Jay-Z's intro to Rihanna's "Umbrella." Then the next song after that on my playlist might be something like say, Bob Dylan or Johnny Cash. Now if that isn't eclectic I don't know what is. :) Well I'd better stop before I make my comment a book as well. Hoping your day is blessed my new friend from Utah. Look forward to our e mail exchange. I'm learning a lot from you. :)



  6. While there are still places to go, I suppose, to get out to star gaze and mediate in nature... well, they're all public.

    Where I lived, it was all private property. And the boundaries of privacy were sufficient that those who shared access to the private property weren't just a glance away.

    Being the hermit I am, public property hinders my ability to fully drop my defenses.