Thursday, February 18, 2010

Dear Mormon Church,

You should let your youth take my ballroom classes instead of going to mutual without making them feel like bad Mormons.

Ballroom is an uplifting, mutual, and social activity--as well as an excellent skill which is healthy for your mind and body (further explanation will be found on my website soon).

There's also economical and social benefits as the more the Academy prospers, the more jobs I'll be able to open up, and the more scholarships we will be able to offer to students who cannot afford to learn dance.

Having those evening hours on Tuesday and Wednesday would be extremely beneficial to the Academy... please?!

Besides, I learned more about being an awesome hetero husband and luvah dancing ballroom than playing stupid crab soccer.

It would also help Mormon kids be less dorky and much more awesome. Like me.

Yours Not So Truly Anymore Because You Don't Like Homos,
Andrew M. Pankratz


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  2. That is funny, lol. Thanks for making me smile. :)

  3. PG: mutual = weekly activities for aaronic priesthood and young women

    crab soccer in ut is probably a lot more different than what it is where you're from.

    and you should get your curacao checked out...

    ABrooks: You're welcome!

  4. I blame my wrist problems on being forced to play crab soccer.

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