I've decided to forgive the Church for the damage dealt me and to move on with my life. There will probably be some further pain and damage control to be done... but, that's what the other cheek is there for, n'est-ce pas ?
In whole, I'm finished being hurt and victimized, and I'm ready to optimistically approach life, modeling such -- hopefully -- after the doctrines as taught in the Bible and, perhaps more specifically, the Book of Mormon.
I really adore the Book of Mormon. The doctrines found therein are really basic and simple... timeless -- meaning, the doctrines are applicable to any time period and any culture, really (there's nothing about women not being allowed to speak or to have their heads uncovered; there's nothing about specific foods one must avoid... in whole, I believe the most core way to live is found within the Book of Mormon).
This blog -- which in the recent past was used to express my hurt -- will now hopefully be a lighthearted account of my life -- the joys, the pains, the ups, the downs, the great adventure life has in store for me as a gay Christian.
I've decided to forgive the Church for the damage dealt me and to move on with my life. There will probably be some further pain and damage control to be done... but, that's what the other cheek is there for, n'est-ce pas ?
ReplyDeleteYeah, for me (and you, think) this was a major reason why I had to leave the church - to be able to put the past behind me and move on. Thought that doesn't mean that when the church does the same thing to others that I'll be silent, just that I'm no longer really bitter towards them because of what I personally experienced. When it happens to someone else, that is different.
I'd cheer any move that puts you in a happier place but you're a pendulum that swings back and forth pretty quick.
ReplyDeleteAm I going to get smacked in the head the next time you swing back?
Craig: Yeah, I'm not so content with the idea that other people are currently caught in the horrible mess we once found ourselves... but, I'm thinking the best way to help those people is to go out and live the best choice and prove, via example, which life is better -- as we honestly compare our new lives with the lives we lived as devout mormons.
ReplyDeletePlaya: but you're a pendulum that swings back and forth pretty quick
Aren't I, though? I've been thinking a lot about my impulsive pendulism, and I think a lot of it has to do with my need to please those whom I love and respect and my need to do what I feel is the best thing to do.
I've finally realized, though, that I can't do both. So, I'm -- once and for all (ha, I say that often, don't I?) -- not going to worry about pleasing those whom I love and respect if it conflicts with doing what I feel is the best thing to do.
I think officially resigning from Mormonism will keep me to my "once and for all."
(My pendulisticality could also just be due to my extremely short attention span... I get bored easily if I'm sitting in the same spot for too long.)
Am I going to get smacked in the head the next time you swing back?
Absolutely! After all, I believe in smacking as many people as I possibly can as I swing back and forth... it makes things oh-so-much-more interesting.
I used to go back and forth quite a bit myself (though not as much as you, true). I think that happens much more when one is active to semi-active in the church. You know deep down what's really right, but you're being told you have to do something else or be damned. Once you separate yourself from that mindset, its a lot easier to stick to one (right) decision.
ReplyDelete