Sunday, June 29, 2008

Man In the Mirror

As I've been evaluating my life these past few months, I've been noticing a significant difference in the quality of my life when compared to my past years. My attitude is now lighter; my ability to handle stress and anxiety has strengthened; I no longer fall asleep in tears of fear and hopelessness of the morrow -- on the contrary, I most often fall asleep smiling, anxious for the next day.

I am becoming more and more financially independent -- the aforementioned interview went well, and I got the position (which entails a $4.75/hr raise in pay and other benefits that were not included in my now part-time position).

I know I've mentioned this difference before, but things just keep improving, and I cannot equate it to anything but the love and guidance of God. I really hope my family will be able to recognize this improvement in my life and know that God has not forsaken me nor I Him. I know there will be some rough times ahead with them, especially once/if I find a spouse. I know some of them, if they were in California, would be actively pushing the amendment that would block gay marriage.

Such is difficult for me to think about; it's difficult for me to understand.

But I have hope for the future; I have faith that hearts will be humbled and softened, and I hope my future family will be a trigger for Christ's light to start making that change.

And speaking of a future family, I think I'm ready to start dating now... however, I don't really know where to look...


  1. Ha, I love the way you ended this. I'm sure you meant it just as a simple statement, but I love the implication that you are now accepting applications and phone numbers from blog visitors. Have you already been bombarded with requests?

    Glad to hear things are going well for you.

  2. I think one reason my parents and family, though devout Church members, have all grown so supportive of my decision to live openly as a gay man in a committed relationship with a man is because they have seen the positive impact being out of the closet, accepting myself, and having a loving, intimate relationship has had on me.

  3. original mohomie:

    Indeed, I meant it only as a simple statement... but applications may not be a bad idea...


    I hope my family's hearts will be as open as yours!